If I Could Only

If I could only
undo
things done
to me
Unbelieve
lies forced
onto me
Unfeel
the hatred
with which
I was loved

If I could only
escape
the tangled
net of lies
with which
my family
was held
together

Love and hatred
I can't keep them
apart

If I could only
free myself
of YOU
If I could only
shake you
away
strip you
off
like an old skin
that I no longer
need

If I could only
forget you
EVIL
done to me
Evil
forever tainting
my life
my love
Poems
The Most Beautiful Present

Everything
around me
is alive
Things, plants
people
calling out
to me:
See me
Come close
and touch
Take me
in
Make me
yours

I give you
the most beautiful
present
Everything
around me
seems to say

I give you
myself
Today

Today
I dance
on the beach
Dive
in the water
Today
I fly
high
above
the jagged
mountain tops
Today
I am free
Today
I am
every
one
every
thing
A Last Time For Everything

There is a last time
for everything
A last time
for letting the waves
caress my body
for feeling
the sun
in my face
A last time
for smelling
the sweet
sea perfume
A last time
for being
the way
I am
now
Jade green transparent walls

Jade green
transparent
walls
above the Prussian blue
horizon
break
before the reef
Here
the water is calm
and dark arms of coral
form a large
pool
of quiet water
above a  bed
of golden sand
Gentle waves
break
the blue sky
mirror
Open windows
through the surface
into the liquid
emerald
water
of Haena
My Love
come close to me
Dearest savior
Companion
in pain
Promise
of peace
Eternal
salvation
Let the thought
of you
free
my tormented
soul
Hidden Inside Me

Hidden
inside me
is a voice
that knows
all songs
A dancer
that knows
all moves
A bird
that flies
to the end
of the world

Hidden
inside me
is a heart
that loves
all men
all things

Hidden
inside me
is a soul
that cries:
Let me out
What's It All About?

I stand
and I wait
You may
or may not
come
And does it
matter?
People come
and go
laugh
and cry
love
and hate
feel joy
and pain
We live our lives
But do we
ever touch?
People come
and go
and I stand
and wait
and I ask myself
What's it all about?
You Can Say Thomas Tenderly Too

You can say
Thomas
tenderly too
You can
whisper it
in my ear
A gentle breeze
Instead of
using it
as a
swear
word
An expression
in your face
a tone
in your voice
As if I were
something
dirty
Instead of
howling it
out
As if I were
far away
A hailstorm
of fists
A hurricane
of abuse
As if I were
a monster
you need
to destroy

You can say Thomas
tenderly too
You can whisper it
in my ear
for I am
right
here
One Tear

I keep
my head
above
an ocean
of sadness
I can
barely
breathe
I am afraid
one
single
tear
would drown
me
drown
you
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